And So Mello Ate Bunnies
by Cyri's Alter Ego
Summary: ...Or not. Mello without his chocolate is a very dangerous creature. Mello with his chocolate in the shape of a bunny... Well, that's possibly even worse. Light MelloxMatt, rated T for language.


**I finally did it. I finally gave in and read Death Note. And of course, my favourite character was the one who appeared for two minutes and then died. Although I'm quite partial to Mello as well.**

**This was lots of fun to write~ It came to me at Easter when I was eating one of those caramel bunnies and thinking at the same time "Wow, Easter must seriously be Mello's favourite time of year..." I don't _think_ Mello and Matt were around for an Easter after Mello 'sploded the building and got his scar and before they both died, but there you go :3 There's light MelloMatt, which of course nobody can complain about (unless you can, in which case, please leave) and it's rated for Mello's serious need to wash his mouth out with soap. And Matt's too, quite frankly. Sorry, but it's not Mello and Matt without lots of swearing.**

_**Disclaimer: **_**I don't own Death Note, as far as I'm aware.**

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**And So Mello Ate Bunnies (Or Not)**

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"Special delivery."

It wasn't so much the voice as it was the tiny packet that sailed through the air and landed on his lap that made Mello look up. Feet on the cluttered coffee table, laptop warm on his thighs, he had been completely absorbed in his Kira notes up until that moment, and had it not been Matt who had just entered, he would have been extremely annoyed at being disturbed.

"You made me lose my train of thought, bitch," he snapped.

Screw that. He was extremely annoyed at being disturbed.

"You're welcome," replied Matt absently, pushing up his goggles as he shut the door and skillfully manoeuvred through the obstacle course of video games, used cigarettes, and - now that Mello seemed to be a permanent fixture there - chocolate bar wrappers that littered the carpet. He picked up a console that looked more or less unharmed and chose the ragged armchair beside Mello's equally ragged sofa to sit on. "I'm not expecting you to be grateful or anything, but I got your chocolate. Maybe that'll satisfy your weird fetish for a while."

In the dim light that swung from a single bulb, the laptop's glow illuminated Mello's face strangely, lending sharp shadow to the ragged scar covering half of his face. At Matt's words, he snorted. "I'll put it on the records that you brought up fetishes first, Matty." There was no response from Matt save for the tinny peeps that meant his attention was now on his game, so Mello looked instead at the packet on his lap. He shifted slightly in disbelief, and his leather protested with a creak. "What the hell's this supposed to be?"

A smile touched Matt's lips, but he didn't take his eyes off his game, resting his elbows on his knees. "'S chocolate, Mels."

"Hardly." Mello glared at the three centimetres of alleged 'chocolate' that Matt had brought him.

"Well, it's Easter tomorrow. They're practically sold out."

"That doesn't mean you had to get me a fucking _bunny_." Furious, Mello ripped the wrapper off the chocolate and found a pair of twin rabbits, smiling expressions and cutesy floppy ears carved endearingly into the confectionary. "Sorry. _Two_ fucking bunnies."

Finally, Matt looked at him. His hair was sticking straight up thanks to the careless way he had pushed up his goggles. "When I said they were practically sold out, I mean it was this or a Creme Egg. Excuse me for not wanting to watch you turn Easter into something filthy."

The scowl slipped from Mello's face then, to be replaced by a coy eyebrow-raise. "Really? Too scared it'll turn you on?"

"In your dreams."

"In yours."

"Fuck you."

"Maybe later."

"Is that a promise?"

Mello snorted again and shut the laptop, sliding it onto the table. He looked back at the bunnies and his frown returned. "This is an insult to chocolate."

Matt rolled his eyes and looked down at his game, where, to his annoyance, he had died. "It'll still taste the same."

"I don't care," grumbled Mello, glowering at the offending rabbits, who smiled blithely back. "I don't eat chocolate bunnies, I'm a sexy Mafia badass. And don't you laugh, Mail Jeevas," he added, as Matt stifled a snigger, "I'm damn well exquisite and you know it." As if to prove his point, he pulled down the zipper on his leather vest several more teeth.

Roger had often told Matt that if he couldn't think of anything nice to say, then not to say anything at all. He supposed a similar rule applied if the only responses he could come up with were shockingly sexual, so he held his tongue.

However, Mello was now clearly in the sort of mood where a severe tantrum would be thrown if anything more than a twenty-third of the general attention were diverted from him, because he removed his feet from the table and sidled up to the end of the sofa closest to Matt. "Is this supposed to last me until the shops restock? Seriously?"

"For God's sake, Mello, just eat the chocolate," Matt replied sharply, chucking his console on the floor as he died again. Just because he enjoyed gaming didn't mean he was any good at it. "Or better yet, don't, and save yourself a lifetime of cavities and me from an evening of watching bunnies get molested." In direct contradiction of his own health warning, Matt promptly lit up a cigarette and took a long drag.

Eyes narrowing in slight disgust, Mello draped himself across the entire length of the sofa and looked up at Matt with his nose and mouth pressed into the couch's arm. He mumbled something that sounded like, "Jesus, you so want me..." (it was difficult to tell through the threadbare sofa stuffing) and then, in a clearer voice, went on, "You could classify chocolate as a vegetable since it contains the cocoa bean, you know."

"And shitloads of sugar," Matt pointed out through a cloud of cigarette smoke.

"And shitloads of sugar," admitted Mello.

Matt stared hard at the two chocolate bunnies. They were now on the table, slightly melted from the sticky warmth of Mello's hand, which gave him an idea. "What if we melted them down so that they weren't bunnies any more? Would that make you any happier?"

Mello's eyebrows disappeared into his hair. He sat up and put one foot on the table again. "What if I stripped you naked and covered you in melted-bunny-chocolate?" he muttered mutinously, glancing at Matt to check his reaction.

This time, Matt couldn't help himself. He blew out a long, steady stream of smoke, and then replied, "Only if you lick it off afterwards, darling."

Without missing a beat, Mello said, "I'd never waste chocolate." Then he grinned. "Mattikins, you are so _dirty_."

"Mmm." Matt returned the grin briefly and spat his spent cigarette onto the floor. He nodded at the bunnies. "You gonna eat them at all, or did you make me buy them for the sole intent of entertaining your sexual fantasies?"

The way the bunnies were lying there, smiling at the grubby ceiling, brought the scowl back to Mello's face. "Bunnies. _Bunnies_," he stressed. Then he picked one of them up and examined it from all angles. "I don't understand why kids are taught to enjoy their chocolate all shaped like this," he observed. "It's just barbaric, really, isn't it? 'Go on, children, bite the bunny's head off.'" He shrugged and took the rabbit between his teeth, snapping it at the neck.

"I don't think you're really the person to be criticising violence, do you, Mels?" said Matt.

One side of Mello's mouth pulled up in a cocky smirk. "Huh. Guess you're right." In one deft movement, he tossed the remainder of the chocolate bunny in the air, tugged the gun from his skin-tight belt, and caught it with a shot before it hit the ground. The blast ricocheted off the walls and the splattered bunny fell in a mess of caramel and gunpowder.

Rolling his eyes, Matt sighed slowly at the new sticky addition to his coffee table. Mello, who had found a spot of caramel on his wrist and was now being careful to fully explore the area with his tongue, was quick to notice this.

"No need to moan, Matty - for you, it's free."

"Shut up." Matt got up and aimed a swat in Mello's direction, pulling down his goggles so that the room was washed in orange.

"What? Don't pretend you don't sit there dreaming of it. Sexy leather, and gunpowder, and caramel chocolate." As Matt snaked a hand out and reached for the other chocolate bunny, Mello cocked his head and his pistol. "In a word, Matty, me."

"Yeah; I mean, you're so fuckin' modest, who could resist, right?" laughed Matt, dodging past the sofa back to the door. He wasn't altogether sure how far Mello was joking, but then again, he never could be certain.

One of these days, Matt thought he might just jump him out of sheer curiosity. It would be worth it just to see Mello's reaction, anyway.

Mello turned around and peered over the back of the sofa, pouting like a petulant child. "You going out again?"

One hand on the door handle, Matt grinned, and broke off the bunny's head with his teeth just like Mello had done. "Yup."

"Where?"

For a moment, for a brief flicker of a moment, Mello was sure that Matt smirked.

"To get that Creme Egg."

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**Wow, I've just read through it again and I realised how childlike Mello is in this XD He never calls Matt 'Matt'; it's only 'Matty', or, on one occasion, 'Mattikins'.**


End file.
